David’s satire extended to restrictions on comedy, proposing “re-programming” for comedians who cause emotional discomfort.
By Shula Rosen
Larry David mocked the Democratic Socialists of America and its policies in a satirical essay published by Air Mail on October 17, 2026, proposing measures ranging from relocating Israelis to Pitcairn Island to requiring white women to wear hijabs on weekends.
Titled “The View from Here,” the essay adopts the approach of Jonathan Swift’s “A Modest Proposal,” with David claiming to have joined the DSA before presenting an absurd platform for the organization.
“The DSA has great respect for religious traditions. Because of our burgeoning Muslim population, we want to take all measures to give these people a strong sense of belonging in America,” David wrote.
“Along those lines, we’ll require that all Caucasian women wear a hijab on weekends in solidarity with their Muslim sisters. In addition, Jews will no longer be allowed to refer to themselves as ‘the Chosen People.’ Henceforth, their new nickname will be ‘the Bagel People.’”
David also targeted the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.
“We strongly believe in a two-state solution. To this end, we propose that Palestinians should be given all the land currently occupied by Israel and that Israel should be given Pitcairn Island in the South Pacific, where the weather is beautiful, and grapefruits are aplenty. We think the Bagel People will be very happy there.”
Other proposals included mandatory siestas, requiring homeowners to accommodate strangers, bereavement leave after the death of pets, including goldfish, and parental leave for pet adoptions. David also proposed that white people serve Black families for a year as reparations for slavery.
His satire extended to restrictions on comedy, proposing “re-programming” for comedians who cause emotional discomfort and exile to Pitcairn Island for repeat offenders.
The essay prompted mixed reactions, including confusion on social media over whether David’s purported DSA membership and proposals were genuine. One Reddit user wrote: “I just can’t bring myself to believe that Larry David doesn’t know the difference between personal and private property. Isn’t Bernie [Sanders] like his first cousin or something?”
The New York Times reported on the essay and said DSA representatives did not respond to a request for comment.
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